All day I’ve been asking myself: What’s my motivation,? Why am I doing this?
Today is day 10 of my Dr. Fuhrman lose 10 lbs in 20 Day Detox Challenge, and today was the hardest day for me. Multiple times during the day, I wanted to give up, grab whatever I wanted out of the fridge, and go back to life as I knew it 10 days ago.
I woke up stressed because today was a big cooking day. The recipes for day 10 looked scary to me. That may sound ridiculous, but even though I’ve had cooking classes, I do not like cooking, it bores me. Pour me a glass of wine, or a keg of Guinness, and I am still not going to enjoy it. It’s not fun, it stresses me out, and then I get crabby and grab the microwaveable junk food.
I was already busy beyond words and I had to cook too? Uggg shoot me now!
So when I saw Blueberry Breakfast Cobbler for breakfast and saw the word “microwave” in the instructions, suddenly I became interested. This was such an easy meal. Banana, blueberries, rolled oats, raisins, chopped almonds, cinnamon and coconut, tossed into a bowl and microwaved.
Oh Dear Lord! This flavorful compote served warm has comfort food written all over it. This is perfect for a cold day, sitting in front of a fire, in a rustic log cabin, while drinking a cup of hot cocoa with someone you love. The flavors really taste like a Blueberry cobbler and it has made my favorite food list and I am not easy to please.
Lunch was a Jamaican Jerk Vegetable Salad. I expected a lot out of this recipe. Jamaican food is supposed to be really good and I was really excited. The recipe wasn’t hard, but took more time than I wanted to give it today, but I was curious.
The veggies cooking looked amazing..
The meal served as per the recipe page on day 10. I added Oranges instead of extra mango.
The meal without the bed of lettuce.
End result? I was underwhelmed. I wanted more flavor, a bit more spice. It looked good, but this didn’t do it for me. Next time I will double the spices and hope that helps.
Now on to Dinner. I was already tired from the day. I have a lot on my mind, and I really wanted to be taken out for dinner. In fact my daughter suggested tacos, and I almost went.
The Dinner recipe was: Veggies and Orange Peanut Dip from Day 8 and Szechuan Sesame Stir fry. This was a meal that meat eaters could add chicken to, but I was going all plant- based.
I opted to leave out the veggies and peanut dip, and focus on the stir fry. The recipe looked harder than it was, I was stressing out for nothing. I didn’t have any sesame seeds so I substituted Tahini. My husband loves food like this, so I was hoping it was good because I want him eating tasty, healthy food, but I wasn’t too confident.
I do not use filters on my photos, and I don’t think this photo does this recipe justice.
This recipe tastes a lot better than it looks. When I substituted the tahini it made a creamy sauce and I loved it! The flavor was amazing and I’d go so far as to say addicting. Next time I will add carrots, portobello mushrooms and celery.
Well I did it. I made it through day 10!
It was a struggle, and I wasn’t sure I’d do it, but it’s over now.
I’m still asking myself why I am doing this? What is motivating me to keep going?
“Don’t Quit Five Minutes Before The Miracle Happens”
This is what motivates me. This is what keeps me going when I want to give up.
A simple quote used in 12 step meetings all over the world, and one that has changed so many lives.
I didn’t quit when recovery for Anorexia and Bulimia got hard, I wanted recovery, I wanted to live.
I didn’t quit when 3 life threatening pregnancies got hard, I wanted to be a good Mom and raise amazing people.
I didn’t quit when cancer stole my breasts and left me feeling like a freak. I re-defined “normal” and started liking being a bit different.
I didn’t quit when early menopause left me feeling crazy. I rode the waves, apologized for being a bitch, and made it through to the other side.
Sometimes days suck, and life feels like a shit show, but there is always light in the darkness, there is always someone willing to carry the umbrella in your storm, if you let them.
Sometimes being vulnerable is hard, relying on others to be strong when we can’t be, can make us feel weak. But “when we are weak, then we are strong.” That’s when God meets us where we are, imperfections and all, and loves us through it. Thats when our faith has to be stronger than our fear.
A lot of people I love are hurting right now, and I’m sitting here blogging about food and doing a silly detox. But it’s not silly if its important to someone. Each one of us have our own journey. We can’t compare our lives to one another. Sometimes were up, and able to support others, and sometimes we need to be supported.
So we keep going one day at a time, give what we have, and pray that somehow, something we do touches someone, and leaves an imprint on their hearts.
A miracle is coming, I can feel it.
I can’t quit, I want to see it.
Thank you for stopping by.
Take good care of you,